Forgiveness is essential for maintaining good mental health as it allows individuals to let go of negative feelings such as anger, resentment, and bitterness. Holding on to these emotions can lead to chronic stress, anxiety, and depression, which can negatively impact overall well-being.
Forgiving someone should be done selfishly, as it is an act of self-care. It is important to understand that forgiving someone is not about excusing or forgetting the hurt that was caused but rather about releasing the burden of negativity and moving on. Holding onto anger and resentment only adds more suffering to one’s life.
When individuals forgive, they often report feeling a sense of lightness and freedom. Forgiveness can bring a sense of closure and peace, allowing individuals to move on and focus on the present rather than dwelling on the past.
Forgiving myself was the hardest thing to do, never mind others…
I’m still working on it
Doesn’t “resentment/self-loathing” feel PHYSICALLY HEAVY?
It’s as if there was a belt wrapped around my heart, slowly squeezing it until it became too hard to breathe.
My mind wouldn’t stop, which of course, affected my physical actions. I liken it to a very mild form of Turret’s.
I would make sudden, harsh noises as physical manifestations of what I was thinking about and feeling. I would suddenly slam my hand on a table or punch a wall.
When I was a teen, I took a serrated knife and ran the edges of the teeth across my knuckles, wearing down the skin until it bled.
I held it to my wrist a number of times, but I didn’t really want to kill myself. I just want the feelings of pain and despair TO END. So physical pain was how I “coped” .
When you grow up “dirt poor,” opportunities don’t feel like they exist. When you grow up around abuse, it’s a challenge to see positivity. When you grow up around alcoholism, you either abhor alcohol, or “embrace it.”
How am I now?
I’m working on being a “net-giver” for the remainder of my life. I realize that my life can only be judged after I’m gone, not from the beginning, middle, or even later.
Personally, I feel like I’ve been such a “taker” for the majority of my life. That’s where the “net-giver” comes into play.
One piece of advice that DRAMATICALLY changed my life for the better?
I don’t participate in “small talk,” I speak earnestly. Our community members will tell you that I get right to the point bc I dislike miscommunication and “filler” convos.
Silence is FINE 狼
“Say what you mean and MEAN WHAT YOU SAY!”
Yes, I know it’s off-putting to many. But I know it’s sincere and clear and most importantly, since I’m not holding back (most times), internal pressure doesn’t build up . Read that again…LESS PRESSURE.
Have those difficult convos sooner, rather than later. That pressure build up is KILLING YOU.
I want you to be content in life. Holding things in prevents that…
I wish you all peace and love